Author: forestwizard

  • The Word

    The Word

    In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.

    John 1:1

    For a long, long time, my whole life, maybe, I’ve believed that magic requires some kind of secret magic words; exactly like in the movies. All I need to do to get the results I want is to find the right magic words to use.

    I followed a magician several years ago who taught that complicated rituals always work, but people don’t want to do the hard stuff so they don’t do it.

    As time has gone on, I’ve realized that this is obviously not a helpful way to experience existence. In part because it plays into this idea that if you just follow the directions exactly, you’ll do magic. It’s easy to think of magic like baking; you can’t just throw whatever you want into the oven and expect to pull out a load of sourdough.

    Instead, I’ve learned that just doing the ritual as written, following the instructions exactly, is akin to miming in the kitchen. You’re stirring an empty bowl. You’re waiting for a nonexistent loaf to rise in a cold oven.

    Magic isn’t about stuff or things or getting all the correct ritual tools or incense ingredients. It’s about something that we can’t express in words. And that’s the point.

    What if, instead, the words themselves are the magic? What if our language literally creates the world around us?

    And, in this case, I don’t mean “magically.” I mean our language literally shapes the environment around us in a way we can understand and relate to others about.

    Without a word for “chair,” we’d just sit on whatever and consider it fine. There would be no concept in our brain for a specific object you sit on with legs and a back.

    I think this is most evident when you look at something in nature. You might see a leaf, for example, and notice that the leaf is green. You’ll see a solidly green object. But, if you decide to look deeper into the leaf, beyond the idea of “green,” you’ll notice tons of shades and tones and different aspects of green. Suddenly it seems silly to call this thing “green” when it contains such a verdant rainbow.

    Rosicrucians describe this concept as learning to see the world as an artist might and learning to “think artistically.” Most of us see our words as solid and “real,” but in actuality, they simply attempt to add order to a perceived chaos. Words allow human being to experience a shared reality. A shared realization of the infinite actuality.

    Western Esotericism seems to, in a major way, intend to teach us that our words (both spoken and internal) have immense power. If we can change our words, and change the associations we have those words, we can change our minds, and eventually, change the world.

    Don’t let the negativity win.

  • Tongalin Family History Vol. 1

    Viktor Tongalin is known today as the Grand Master of the vampires of Forgotten Hollow. He slew the former master and founder of the town, Vladislaus Straud. Straud was a reclusive and enigmatic figure. His distance caused the townsfolk to both honor and fear him.

    Viktor has taken a different approach, making himself widely known for his cruelty and incivility. The Tongalin Vampire Clan has grown so evil and expansive that other, smaller groups of good vampires have bonded together to try and overthrow the tyrant. But how did we get to this point? Was Viktor always evil?

    The Tongalin Vampire Clan is notoriously tight-lipped about their personal lives. Their histories, of course, do not appear in the town archives. Even National Leader Emmit Tongalin, apparently the grandson of Viktor, refuses to speak to reporters about his family, distant as they may be.

    Therefore, this record is sourced from urban legends, rumors, and circumstantial evidence found in town records, as well as bits and pieces from interviews of other Tongalins and present-day neighbors of Tongalin properties. This is my best reconstruction of the Tongalin family history, but please don’t take it as actual fact.

    Beginnings

    Extremely little about Viktor’s parents or their ancestors is known to the public. I imagine that, like many wealthy families in the past, the Tongalin family probably settled in Willow Creek. Very little evidence of any original settlers has survived, as most of the structures in town are relatively knew. At this time, we have no way of knowing when or where or who began the Tongalin story in our region, or even where they came from, if anywhere.

    What we do know is that Viktor’s family was extremely successful. At the height of their success, an ancestor built what we know today as the Tongalin Castle. While we are familiar with it today standing on The Crumbling Isle in Windenberg, it was originally built in the Llama Lagoon neighborhood of Newcrest, not far outside Willow Creek. We’ll discuss its move in a future volume.

    The castle was enormous, styled after medieval French castles, and, as you might expect, didn’t fit into the newly-built neighborhood at all. Neighbors referred to the structure as “Tongalin’s Folly,” seeing it as an ugly and ostentatious waste of money. I imagine this caused the Tongalins to hide away from these critical neighbors, using the castle for its actual purpose, defense. The privacy of the Tongalins, in their comically large house, created a belief that the family was “crazy,” maybe even evil. Some of the stories I heard were wild.

    A Willow Creek resident told me that her grandparents heard stories of “Tongalin’s Murder Palace”, a la H.H. Holmes.

    Others told stories of intense familial abuse of all kinds, satanic rituals, kidnapping and murder, and much more. With no hard evidence of any kind, anything can be true (or made up).

    What I can verify is that Viktor, as he grew up, made a bit of a name for himself. He was a businessman, seemingly in an unrelated field to his family, though he still lived in the castle. I was unable to find any records of any other family living with him. The remains of any ancestors of Viktor have never been found.

    He married a young woman named Ari Hampton. The two held their ceremony in the chapel of the castle, though I couldn’t find anyone who even knew of someone who was invited or went. Even so, an announcement, without a photo, was published in the local paper’s legal announcements.

    Ari later gave birth to two children, Vivek and Veronica. The family lived a fairly normal life, with the children attending public school in Newcrest, and Ari and Viktor entertaining guests from time to time at the castle.

    I was able to find some secondhand sources (diaries and a few letters from contemporary Tongalin neighbors) which described the couple. Ari was often referred to as quiet and small, though warm and welcoming. Her smile was always broad and genuine. Viktor was described as handsome and tall, muscular and charismatic. Though, some sources described his voice as having an uncomfortable and unsettling steely tone. One resident even wrote of Viktor having an aura of ravenous darkness around him, as if he was sucking up and destroying all the light.

    While I can’t know what exactly was meant by this, or what it refers to specifically, I think it’s important to mention it now.

    The Catalyst

    Looking back over this (lack of) history, it’s easy to assume it was this one completely random moment that completely changed the lives of the Tongalin family forever. Though, it’s much more likely that this moment was part of a much larger behavioral trend. We can only guess at what that looked like.

    It’s not likely that Viktor and Ari were living a completely happy life with no issues when Ari one day walked in on her husband in the throws of passion with her own brother, Del. Some reports say the marital and familial transgression happened in the very chapel where the young couple was married.

    Allegedly, Ari was so overwhelmed with grief and shock that she died in that very moment. It’s likely the actual cause was a heart attack, but since her body was cremated, we’ll never know for sure.

    When Ari died, her two children were very young. They both grew up with only fuzzy memories of their mother because of Viktor’s inability to even hide his destructive behavior from his wife.

    Ari’s brother Del became the subject of town gossip for years and years. His presence gave folks a whole new supernatural aspect of their myth-making.

    In Volume 2 we’ll look into the claims that Viktor not only prefers men to women, but has an uncanny ability to give any man the ability to become pregnant and give birth.

    Ari’s Resting Place

    Initially, Ari’s urn was interred in the upper chamber of the Tongalin Family Crypt, located within the Tongalin Castle. This crypt was open to the public on special occasions, and we know for sure that Ari’s remains rested in a dedicated niche for many years before being moved to the Willow Creek Park Cemetery. This move coincides with the Togalins leaving the castle, seemingly for good.

    At the rear of the chapel was a small room that houses the stairs to the crypt. In this room Ari’s urn sat at the feet of a weeping angel.

    While we know her remains were moved to Willow Creek, I have not been able to verify it personally, as the Tongalin crypt is always kept locked.

    Join us in Volume 2 to look into Viktor’s relationship with Del, their children, the first alien abduction, and the Tongalin’s dramatic exodus from Newcrest.

  • a new understanding of Temperance

    a new understanding of Temperance

    Temperance is a card that has followed me around my whole life. It’s the card that has come up for me in personal card pulls more than any other, by far. It feels like it’s connected to something very deep inside me.

    So, imagine my frustration when I am unable to figure out the message of the card, again and again. The meaning alluded me completely.

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  • Depression, Magic, and Shifting Reality

    Depression, Magic, and Shifting Reality

    A fairly major part of occultism is the idea that you can shift reality to suit your needs. How this works depends on the tradition or system you subscribe to, but essentially the idea is that you can use your mental powers to create real, physical change around you.

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  • Pentacles – Within and Without

    Pentacles – Within and Without

    The minor arcana has four suits, and each suit, very broadly, represents a different facet of our lived experience.

    • Cups: Emotions/Love (water)
    • Swords: Ideas/Thoughts (air)
    • Wands: Feeling/Judgement (fire)
    • Pentacles: Sensation/Materialism (earth)

    Because of that last bullet point, pentacles are often associated with money.

    The reason for this post, however, is to look into a strange detail that exists throughout the entire tarot deck.

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  • Silence

    Silence

    Last week I was depressed. Not the usual all-the-time low-grade depression that’s been normal for me since childhood, but instead something hard and intense and ruthless.

    It came out of nowhere and instantly took me down into the depths of sadness and despair. I had entered a new, unfamiliar reality where every person despised me and I was a horrible burden to anyone I locked eyes with.

    I’ve been there before, but I hate it. When I’m in it, it feels so real. Much more real than even this moment now. Like a veil has been lifted and I can now see actuality.

    I can’t, of course, but that’s what it feels like.

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  • The Fool

    The Fool

    For the uninitiated, a tarot deck contains 78 cards that are used for divinatory purposes. These cards are split into two main sections: the major and the minor arcanas. The major arcana consists of 22 named images, starting with 0 – The Fool, and ending with 21 – The World. It’s in the major arcana that we find notable cards such as Death and The Lovers.

    The minor arcana, on the other hand,consists of four suits, each numbered ace-10 and followed by four court cards.

    Eliphas Levi said that if you were locked in solitary confinement and the only book you had access to was a deck of tarot cards, you could, eventually, learn everything there was to know. Tarot, according to Levi, is a book of universal symbols that are intended to convey universal laws.

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